Letter To A Church

  

I’m coming out. Don’t be surprised. Don’t be angry. It will all be just fine. Yes, I am a pastor. All the more reason to believe that I know the theology behind what I am about to say. 


I know you will be shocked. But believe me, what I am about to tell you is fully accepted under another name already. So, please be understanding and loving. This isn’t easy. For years I have wanted to come out. But the time wasn’t right. Now it is.


Ok, here goes. I am a pedophile Christian! Now before you become too alarmed, remember, I am a pastor. I understand the Bible. I speak at large conferences with “famous Reformed leaders”. I have written books. You can trust me. 


Please don’t misunderstand me. I also know that if I were to act out my desires for little boys, you would have reason to be concerned. But I don’t. In fact, I know that if I did, it would be terribly wrong in the eyes of God. In fact, I’m so against the action, I don’t even like using the term “Christian pedophile”. As a result, I have invented the term “little-boy attracted”. I use the initials LBA. Don’t let these letters be confused with “Lesbian, Bi-sexual, and Asexual”. I am simply attracted to little boys. I know I am not alone. That is why we plan to start a group in our church for LBA Christians.


Others who use the term "pedophile Christian" are making that their identity and it is wrong. Therefore, I use the phrase "little-boy attracted" (LBA) and that makes it OK. Don't forget, I don't act on my attraction to little boys, so it is acceptable to use that phrase. 


To those who think this is wrong, I would like to teach you the difference between temptation and sin. Jesus was tempted but he didn’t sin. Just as you and I are tempted in different ways. The temptation is not sin, but yielding to it is sin. That is why I am assuring you that I do believe if I yield to my temptation to be with little boys, it would surely be wrong in God’s eyes. But I don’t. I am celibate in this area. Therefore, it is ok to be LBA.


If you are still having a hard time hearing this, I understand. Let me quote the man who helped others to understand the confusion. Men like Tim Keller, Mark Dever, John Piper, and Al Mohler, just to name a few, have all been helped to see that what I am saying is legitimate. The man who helped them is Sam Allberry. 


Here is what Sam says, that relates equally to my attraction. “All I’m saying is the particular form of sexual temptation I experience is this particular kind. All of us are fallen in this area of life. All of us experience disordered desires that affect our sexual desires as well. So, all of us are sexual sinners. Same-sex attraction is a particular way in which that fallenness works its way out in my life. So I tend to use that language.”


I know what you are thinking. Couldn’t this lead to other things in the church? Sure, it could. And it should. As pastor, I’m planning to start a number of small groups to help others who are tempted in our church. I got the idea from Sam Allberry in this article. In fact, within the next few months we plan to have the following small support groups to help all our members and those who attend occasionally. This should increase our influence and provide a welcoming environment in our church. Here is a partial list.


MWA: For those attracted to married women

AA: For those attracted to animals

MPA: For those attracted to multiple partners

SOMA: For those attracted to sex outside of marriage


Remember the quote above from Sam Allberry? “All of us are fallen in this area of life. All of us experience disordered desires that affect our sexual desires as well.” We are just wanting you to feel comfortable in our church, whatever your sexual desires are. 


Of course, we realized we need other small groups as well. So here are additional groups to be added in the fall.


IDA: For those attracted to illegal drugs

C&GA: For those attracted to covetousness and greed

LM&WA: For those (men and women) who are attracted to laziness

OEA: For those who are attracted to over eating


And so, the teens don’t get left out:


RDA: For teens attracted to rebellion and disobedience

LSOA: For teens attracted to lying and sneaking out at night


Finally, we will even have a small group for the littlest among our church.


TTA: For those attracted to throwing temper tantrums

FCA: For those attracted to fussing and crying when they don’t like what mommy and daddy told them


Another thing we will begin doing as a church. We recently came across a very helpful tool on Sam’s website to make sure we are inclusive as a church. We will begin opening up our church leadership roles to those who identify specifically with any of the initials above. We certainly don’t want anyone to feel left out. Just because you identify as an LBA (little boy attracted) Christian, don’t think you can’t be a pastor in our church. We will promote you as celibate LBA Christian and the church will fully accept you. In fact, you might even get speaking engagements and book endorsements for coming out as I have.


In summary, this should really be a help to the church. Rather than just viewing ourselves as Christians, former sinners who have been regenerated by the power of the Gospel, who are now saints, to the glory of God, we can further divide the church in a useful way that will make us all feel comfortable. After all, we have accepted the label “carnal Christian” (those who live in carnality while being Christian) for so long, this should not be a surprise to any of us. We have come a long way in our conformity to Christ.


Sincerely,

Your Pastor